How to Help a Loved One Declutter Their Home

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Inside: A simple guide to help a loved one declutter their home without causing them to feel overwhelmed.

How I helped my mom declutter over 30 years of belongings as a professional declutterer and organizer.

I recently helped my mom declutter her home before her move. It took us a whole year to go through thirty-plus years’ worth of belongings.

Yes, one year, but don’t let that scare you. I’ll explain why in a bit.

Now she lives in her new place with plenty of space and less clutter, making her daily routine simpler and more enjoyable.

Helping a loved one declutter requires patience and support, not pressure.

Remember, decluttering isn’t a quick fix; it takes time. Showing patience can help your loved one feel more comfortable and less overwhelmed throughout the process.

One thing to remember is that a person needs to WANT to declutter their belongings and not be forced into it.

If emotional attachment is a concern, gently acknowledge it and offer support to help them decide what to keep and what to let go.

This understanding can ease their anxiety and make the process smoother.

Create a decluttering plan

When you notice someone may need help with decluttering, offer to assist by starting a gentle and supportive conversation.

Approach with empathy, asking open-ended questions to understand their feelings and preferences, which helps build trust and makes them more open to help.

Creating a decluttering plan is essential so everyone understands the process. Ask these questions and write them down to refer back to if needed.

Why do they want or need to declutter?

They need a clear “why” for wanting to declutter their home. Some common reasons include reducing cleaning time, simplifying home maintenance, or preparing for a move. Understanding this will help keep them motivated throughout the process.

How much are you willing to let go of?

It could be as little as 25%, 50%, or as much as 75% of their items. This helps you guide them in letting go because you know how much they’re willing to part with.

How much time do you have to declutter?

Do they need to move by a specific date, and how much time each week can they dedicate to decluttering? If they have a fixed move-out date, develop a decluttering plan that allows enough time to declutter, pack, and move before that date.

If they are not moving, then how much time can they dedicate to decluttering sessions each week? It might be one hour a day and three hours on weekends — whatever works best for them.

These three questions will help develop a plan to simplify the process when you help a loved one declutter their home.

Start with the most commonly used spaces, like the living room or kitchen

Starting in the living room or kitchen can make it easier to notice differences when removing items. Focusing on these busy areas also helps determine what to declutter, rather than starting with the bedroom closet.

Focus on one space at a time before moving on to the next.

Declutter together — but let them decide

When helping a loved one declutter their home, your role is to guide and support, not to control what they keep or donate.

Asking questions such as “Do you still use this?” or “How long has it been since you used it?” can help them make better decisions about what to keep and what to let go.

If they haven’t used it in over a year, remind them they probably won’t use it again and that donating the item can help someone in need right now.

Respect their decision even if you disagree. Recognizing that what is valuable to you may not be to them helps your loved one feel understood and respected, which encourages cooperation.

It’s best to guide them, provide support, and allow them to make their own decisions.

Know when to take breaks

This is very important when you help a loved one declutter their home. This was one reason it took us about a year to declutter my mom’s home.

When I noticed my mom starting to get tired, we would skip a week and pick up the following week from where we left off. I realized that when she asked if I was bringing my toddler, it was because she wanted a visit, not to declutter on that day.

Instead, I would go to my mom’s, bring my toddler for a visit, and we wouldn’t do any decluttering.

Or she would also tell me that the next day would work better for her.

Those were the signs I observed when my mom was exhausted, so even though we had planned to declutter that day, we continued the next day.

Watch for signs of emotional overload and take breaks as needed.

Encouraging rest and returning later can help your loved one feel safe and supported, making decluttering less stressful.

Taking a week off from decluttering helped us clear out more items. We were able to pick up where we left off, and my mom was willing to let go of more things after seeing them a second time, which led to even more decluttering.

Offer support during and after decluttering

There are numerous ways to help a loved one declutter their home.

Offer to bring a few boxes and trash bags for donations.

Arrange a donation pickup from a non-profit at their front door.

If you can’t find a non-profit that picks up donations at their front door, offer to drop off the donations at the nearest donation center.

Bringing supplies and volunteering to remove donations from the house will speed up the process of clearing items.

Share your easy, clutter-free habits for maintaining a tidy space.

Every item in the home should always have a designated place or ‘home.’

For example, when you walk in, put your work bag in the entryway, store your keys and wallet in a drawer, and place your shoes on the shoe rack. This rule applies to all items—skincare, cleaning supplies, clothes, and more. If an item doesn’t have a home, find one for it; if you can’t, consider decluttering it.

If it takes less than a minute, do it right now.

For example, the trash is full, take it out to the bin. After you finish your coffee, instead of putting it in the sink, wash it by hand. Instead of leaving dirty clothes on the floor, put them directly in the laundry basket. This will save you time throughout the day and help keep your space clutter-free.

One-in, one-out rule.

When you add something new, you should remove something similar. For example, when a new sweater arrives, either a similar one or one that doesn’t fit or you don’t enjoy should be decluttered. The one-in, one-out rule applies to shoes, purses, decorations, coffee cups, and more. Using this rule helps prevent clutter from building up again.

Create simple systems that are easy to maintain

Use bins and labels to show where items are stored. For example, a clear bin in the kitchen cabinet labeled ‘medicine’ indicates exactly where all the medicine is kept.

Bins and labels are helpful throughout the home, including pantries, for cleaning supplies, body care items, and more.

This makes it easy to locate items and return them to their proper places.

Seek help from a professional declutterer and organizer

If helping a loved one declutter their home feels overwhelming or you lack the time, consider hiring a professional.

Hiring a professional declutterer and organizer can simplify the process for everyone involved. They will guide you through the entire decluttering process and leave you with systems to help prevent re-cluttering.

Find an organizer via Google or a Becker Certified Professional.

It will cost money, but it will save you significant time and reduce stress.

Final thoughts

Helping a loved one declutter their home can strengthen relationships. Creating a plan that makes the process easier is more important than rushing. Ultimately, creating a calmer and more functional home offers many benefits.

I hope this post provides you with some ideas on how to help a loved one declutter their home or how you can declutter your own home.